10 BOLD Predictions For The Future
Hello,
If you think the world’s going crazy, wait for what’s about to hit your face in the coming years.
Based on my geo-synthetic, tacto-strategic models which track key metrics like the woke index and brain rot dominance score, I have arrived at 10 extremely bold predictions for our future.
(They can take anywhere from the next 5-500 years to play out to be very honest)
Prepare your bodies. Here we go:
Extraterrestrial life has been finally confirmed. To make their existence known, the aliens decide to make their first appearance on Nikhil Kamath’s podcast.
Japan’s population decline is so bad, that Forbes 30 Under 30 gets only 15 entries. The government tries to announce a free Only Fans subscription for men who have a kid but even such wildly innovative policies fail to work. Meanwhile, the mass migration of virile young men from Bihar offers a ray of hope. Korea copies this strategy by signing a deal with Uttar Pradesh, sparking optimism amongst investors and pushing Asian markets to new all-time highs.
Ranveer Allahbadia, back to the podcasting game after a minor scuffle in 2025, talks about how the new generation should be allowed to pursue any career they want in one of his motivational episodes. He experiences a brutal online backlash for such horrific comments and is forced to flee the country. Youth activists, enraged by his terribly insensitive statements (which they can’t recall when asked by news reporters), take to the streets and engage in daylight candle march protests.
The public CAN NOT accept such podcast clips Ankur Warikoo writes his 37th Global Bestseller “Write Epic Books” and becomes the first one-man company in Milky Way to achieve a trillion-dollar valuation.
Zepto launches -10 minute deliveries: orders delivered 10 minutes before you can even think of what you want by implanting Neuralink chips in urban people’s brains. Investors herald this as the “future of e-commerce”, and big Indian corporations who had just about started delivering their wares in 17 minutes, are forced to pivot again and infuse an additional $3 Trillion to build out this brand new “growth lever”.
Zomato and Swiggy are each delivering more funny ads than food parcels every day and pivot to becoming advertising agencies once Ozempic destroys people’s cravings and the need to binge on food they don’t really need.
Thanks to massive AI-driven job losses, Narayan Murthy doubles down on his ideas and urges the youth to embrace a 160-hour work week to ensure they can match AIs who don’t whine & complain at work. This sparks nationwide protests on LinkedIn for 7 minutes, after which people move on to the next thing.
The Indian government launches the Jan-Dhan-Python Yojana to ensure that every Indian gets basic training to become a coder and get a job, but skeptics wonder if the masterstroke policy is a few decades late considering how almost all code writing is now automated.
The EU has become the regulation superpower of the world- drafting and passing new laws and regulations about technology even before the technology gets invented. This brings the economy to a record-breaking -2 % growth level and market gurus predict that they’ll soon have to turn to Africa for bailout loans.
Bryan Johnson continues to visit different countries for podcasts but walks out of them right after landing by taking a U-turn inside the airport and flying back home where AQI levels won’t cause a 0.01% toxic deterioration in his nasal hair.
That’s it, friends. I hope you get enough brain food to keep you thinking about for the next year or so.
What are YOUR key strategic predictions for the coming years? Let me know in the comments, perhaps I can crowdsource a 2nd article if I happen to receive enough mind-blowing projections on the state of the planet.
India stuns the world by developing AI chips made purely out of cow dung, marketed as "Gau-Core Processors." These chips, infused with the mystical energy of gomutra-cooled quantum gates, outperform silicon-based AI by a factor of 108 (a sacred number).
To program them, engineers must chant Vedic mantras in perfect Sanskrit, leading to a new breed of software engineers trained exclusively in Ancient DevOps. Tech giants scramble to hire Brahmins fluent in Rig Veda, and IITs introduce B.Tech in Sacred Systems Architecture.
Meanwhile, NASA confirms that extraterrestrial signals are actually responses to "Om Namah Shivaya" mantras, making Vedic chanting the only recognized programming language for intergalactic communication. Google renames Bard to "RishiBot" in tribute, while Silicon Valley rebrands itself as "Vedantic Valley."
Self rinsing reusable toilet paper; refrigerators that multiply your vegetables rather than turn them into stinky science projects; Women impregnated by Musk that actually deliver scientists and inventors who, for the first part, deliver self driving cars; Trump's progeny immigrate to Greenland in an attempt to create their own Aryan nation; Modi wears a Prussian Guardsman's uniform to celebrate India's "GDP" surpassing Germany's; Priyanka Gandhi enters transgender treatment to become a twin to Rahul; California becomes it's own country with the 3rd largest GDP in the world and Canada, Oregon, and Washington states join it in a Union. More, if you want it.....